Wednesday 4 July 2018

'Fokit'......let go and be YOU, YOU are special!

I was sitting outside with a niece
when we saw a group of people walking towards the crematory

with a wrath with 'fokit' on it...…
They were talking Dutch so probably they came for my brother….

They did.
A great group of people who where shocked,
They got a whatsapp 2 weeks ago with
'I am not feeling so good'.....
They didn't realize that this was very special....
he didn't even told some of his brothers……

They reacted with:
'it will be ok soon, you can do it,
it is just temporary…..'
They new him as active, 1000 idea's, upbeat and positive,
they didn't realize that telling other people
'I am not feeling so good'
was being vulnerable,
meaning they where so safe to him
that he could share that….
I hope they will always realise
how important they were for him….

How come he could say that to others and couldn't use it himself…

How come he didn't think he was ok,
 just the way he was,
How come he thought his business wasn't ok,
and nobody would listen to his idea's
-after his dead, the company let his wife know,
that they changed somethings because they saw
that his idea's were so good…..-

How come he couldn't say 'fokit'....
'if you don't like me, to bad for you,
you are missing out!'
'I have lots of people who like me and that is enough.'
 'I have patience, perhaps it is not now, but I am sure that if what I do
is good, it will happen'…

How come he didn't know how important he was for his children
or....did he know something we didn't know….

Did he know that his wife would make sure his children would be ok,
and did he know that she is much more powerful than she thinks she is....
That she will make sure they are ok,
 that they can be them selves,
unique and authentic,
that she will do it different then her mom did,
-she also lost her dad when she was very young-
because she lives in a different time and is a different person,
that she will make sure they realize how important they are
and....don't have to do anything but...

Be themselves.

I am  sure it must be very difficult as a mom to loose a husband....
to take care of yourself AND make sure it will be ok for your children….
It must make you angry as well: you choose together for your children
and now you have to do it yourself….
and....there is not another choice…..
You have to put yourself a side sometimes, because you are an adult....
not always easy...

I am sure you have to say 'Fokit'....many times,
it is not important what other people think, it is important
what makes YOU happy and....what makes YOUR children happy...…

We all had a very special farewell:
lots of happy memory's, the feeling of togetherness,
and also tears….

Trust and letting go of control...…

Old memory's and patterns came up, so we could let them go and....
also realizing that not everyone wants to let them go....
as if it is  safer to hold on and be a victim,
then use your power....

For me/us it was 'Fokit'.....
we are ready to let go,
so love, joy and happiness can fill the space.
Also realizing that dealing with old emotion is a must
if we want to make room for love joy and happiness….

We are happy he in our lifes for 48 years.
He showed us to be happy
and think outside the box
and we...…
we choose to be happy
and if people don't like it....
live is to short not to have fun……

Do we need these experience…..?
I always hope we don't need it,
that we can learn it in an other way,
who are we to judge….
we don't know the big picuture…

The only thing we can do
is accept what is,
choose to be happy.