Saturday 31 October 2020

Love and forgivenis....part 4

'What the world need now....'

50% mom, 50% dad, 100% ME


 On Nov. 12 

we have the last conjunction of Jupiter and Pluto:

do we give our power away or 

are we being honest to look at our own power?

Do we take our time to heal,

or do we want others to heal us.....

Do we still need old rules or can we make new rules,

can we create a new society?

Jupiter and Pluto are both in Capricorn:

it's the sign of patience, 

of determination,

going step by step.

If not, if immature,

it's about depression,

feeling helpless, wanting others to take responsibility,

not allowing yourself to take the time that is needed.

Yes, there is always time for everything,


do we need still more time to be responsible for ourselves?

Do we still need governments to restrict us

or can we be part of the solution?

I hear people say: 'the government is way to strict'

and also: 'they should be more strict, they are to weak'.....

What is the truth?

Is there one truth, 

or depends it on the people?

It is not an outside job anymore,

it is an inside job.....

So the change cannot come from outside,

the only way is transformation....

starting with each of us

For me there is only one truth and that is Love.....

What would love do......

Love will show us what is important.

love gives us as much time as needed to heal.

Love will show us the way back to you,

the you inside,

it will do it

in  a way IT thinks is needed,

is 'best'.....

It seems we need more time to go inside,

we as society are not ready....yet.....

We can get more and more information

on internet, media, social media and

this worked for a lot of years,

and is still important.


did this information transform us,

or did it 'only' changed our thinking,

not our doing.....

and did we forget to think for ourselves....

was it easier that someone else was thinking for us...

Remember that you don't always know the consequents of your actions,

but you have to take responsibility for them....

How is it in your life?

'What would love do.......'

Probably it would tell you,

that you can choose differently next time 

and for now: 'deal with the consequents'


'You get as much changes as you need,

it is not a competition.'

This is a version of  'turn, turn, turn'

by Ilse de Lange.

She felt a bit insecure because it was not a song from her,

but she still did it,

to make someone happy,

and by that made lots of people happy!

In the whole world there is insecurity,

we don't know how this 'new world' will be:

do we do use our courage to go through our insecurity

to help make the world a nicer place to be?

Can we be thankful for our 'old world'

and take the best with us to the new world,

and let go what is not needed anymore,

and fill the space with wonder....with peace, with love.....

Thursday 29 October 2020

Love and forgivenes....'let me live my own life' part 3

 'Let me live my own life'.....(French/Dutch song)

You only can live your life.....

if you heal.....

if you remember you are love...

If you live your own life,

you respect others,

you Know each of us have there own path to go.

You also realise that we all have 

exactly the power and courage inside of us

that we need.....

Let's remind each other... 

be there for each other

and Know....

they, like you, 

need their own time...

'Let's turn people into trees and appreciate them just the way they are'

What a great advice.....

What a great image..... 

Like a beautiful forest, 

we will realise we live in a great world

with beautiful people.

At the moment it is a bit like this:

We are not sure what is chaos
or order.....

In this last week of Mercury retrograde,
there is even more hectic...
more buttons are pushed.....

elections in America...

The results of the elections
are on the day Mercury will turn....
What will happen....

And then, there is the virus....
a lockdown for more country's ?!?.....

Wednesday 28 October 2020

Love and forgiveness....part 2

One more week to go 

with the energy of Mercury retrograde.

Will you choose to go inside and use this energy,

realising that this will be the change that is needed in the world?

Is there 'a war' in yourself?

If you look at yourself and your environment
you will see the signs of war:

-if your body is in pain, or not in balance
-if you attract negativity
-if you react instead of respond
-if you compare yourself
-if your impatient.

Choose to deal with the war inside of you,
because that is the only way to peace.

If this relates to you:
take your time....
it takes as long as needed,
be grateful
be nice to yourself,
you are stronger than you realize..

Also realise that our world is in this transformation,
and it needs YOU for this transformation...

This quote could be 
about someone else,
even the government....

Let's make it personal...

Choose to look inside yourself.
Can you forgive your self?

'Forgiving my self.....
Forgiving my inner child:
it isn't sorry... 
Why should it:
it was 'just surviving'
protecting me, the way it thought best.....
for me as a child it worked,
only not for me as an adult.....'

Even though it was the best for 
me as a child to feel loved,
it wasn't the best for me, 
my Soul,
for my self worth....
I forgot I already was love....

Or could it be 
that this was the only way
for me to grow, to heal,
and that it is now the time
to transform,
to 'grow up',
that I am/ We are ready....

Can you say 'I am sorry' to this part of you?

Decide not to judge yourself,
decide to accept.

Decide to look at your shadows. 
showing in the world around you.
Decide to look at your inner child
that only wants love.
It created an ego to help it
to live on this earth.

Only it went to far....
it became an immature ego,
it forgot to 
'Just be'
and that our soul is on a journey
to grow..

Our 'job' is
to be happy,
to tolerate,
to grow wisdom,
to be grateful and be at peace.

Can we as adult heal 
and create an healthy ego:
set boundaries when needed
and remember we are all one.

I am sure we can,
I trust we can.
Love can.

Monday 26 October 2020

Love and forgiveness.....part 1

 This Mercury retrograde period is in two signs, 

Scorpio and Libra.

From Oct. 28 till Nov. 11 it is in Libra,

so the energy the coming 2 weeks is different

from the last 2 weeks.

Till Nov 3 retrograde, 

it is time to look inside 

and after that

we will see the results 

of what we dealt with inside of us:

in the world and in our own lives.

Did you deal with your emotions, 

did you find your passion

and can you share it now with others 

AND respect others opinions?

Can see see them as mirrors

or do you expect THEM to change....

Be kind to yourself,

take you time,

and realise that everything is not always as you think it is....

Honour yourself.

How do You honour yourself?

I got a great mirror:

An orange cap for me was beautiful, cute

and brought love to my heart.

Not only to me, but to lot's of people around me.

Later I heard that a orange cap had a special meaning:

'take extra care, perhaps something is not as it should be'.

Do you realise the difference in energy?

What would be a more healing energy

for the person wearing the cap?

How do you talk to yourself?

I did a lot of Reiki initiations.

A lot of people learned to use their self healing power.

How many of those use it still for them selves?

Do they all remember 

that only 10 minutes a day would make a huge different?

Something so easy to do,

and still:

it is like drinking water.....

so important for our body and mind,

so easy.......

Both of them are so easy to do and....

also easy not to do....

You have to make a conscious choice..

A choice for Self-love....

Is there a part in us that 'thinks' 

that life and healing has to be difficult 

and hard work,

that we have to deserve love 

instead of realising we ARE love...

Is our immature ego taking over?

Do we give ourselves exactly the time 

we need to grow and heal

or did someone/society let us believe

that quick is better than slow.....

As if each of us 

didn't need a different time to learn how to walk,

as if each of us 

didn't need a different time to learn how to ride a bike


is the one who needed less time to learn how to walk or to ride a bike

a better walker or biker 

and we remember?!?

Let's give ourselves time and remember the end result,

let's keep that in mind,

like you did when you wanted to walk or ride the bike....

Take your unique time....

Friday 23 October 2020


 And then

she is here...

A new generation is born...

We are blessed with a granddaughter

with the beautiful name of Zoe, meaning 'life'.

Isn't it special that all kind of new souls

decided to come to this world 

in this special year.

A reminder to us all

that we can decide to 'live'

instead of to survive.

I hope that all these new souls

will remember their way into this world:

from a safe place close to their mother

they had to find there way into our world....

Not an easy way....

and not an easy world to come in to

at the moment...

I hope they will all remember this,

and we should remember it to...

We all like to be comfortable and we only

grow if we are 'uncomfortable'.

It is an 'uncomfortable' year for us all...

a year to help us to make the next step,

a birth of a new world.

Just like a baby has to trust

that life will be ok after birth,

we have to trust that life

will be ok after 2020.

The birth process is scary and 

also shows us that after 'a dark place/time', 

light will come.

Do we still remember this as adults?

Do we trust that we will be ok,

that after dark, light will come?

Do we remember that

the 'in between' can be scary,

the way from the dark to the light


it is needed.

Needed, so we remember

that we are more powerful than we realise.

It's good to take time to remember...

A child will come in this world,

exactly at the right time....

Do we trust this timing?

Do you have patience with yourself

and do you trust that there is a the perfect time

for you...

How patient are we with ourselves

do we remember that each of us

has it's own perfect time

and there is no competition...?

How do you talk to your inner child?


Live your life

just the way you want to,

take you time,

enjoy, play and be happy.

You have chosen two great parents,

who will be there for you if you have challenges...

You have to go through them yourself

but not alone...

They showed that 

when you were born....

just remember....

Also remember that you can ask for help,

you don't have to do it alone....

remember the doctor and nurses in the hospital....

everyone was there for you.

Also remember that there were guides, angels at your side,

they will stay with you all your life.

Wouldn't this also be a good reminder of ourselves:

we ARE protected,

we ARE guided


we are sometimes stubborn

and 'need' some help to grow....

so we can go back to who we are: 

Light and Love.

Because of the Corona virus,

we can not visit Zoe the coming time.

Of course it would be great to hug and hold her,


I also see it as a gift,

a gift for her:

now she can stay in her bubble a little longer:

from the warm womb,

to a warm home together with mom and dad.

For sensitive people this is great,

they have to get used to this world 

and mom and dad 

are more then enough.

Can you set your own boundaries?

Protect yourself from people/social media/books/environment

and choose what YOU want,

the part that is light and love?

A birth is a challenging journey,

it shows everything about growing,

about transformation.

It show us  that challenges and growing

belong together.

It also showed

that you don't have to do it alone...

You can not predict the challenges you get,

and when you get them.

They come at the right time

and you can deal with them when they come....

just remember your birth,

your first challenge and it will be ok.

Everyone has a special talent,

a unique talent.

You, Zoe will find yours,

just by living.

Always remember your light....

be YOU, 

so you and all the souls who came at this time

can help us and show us

'to Be the change we want to see in the world'

The world is sometimes 'loud and noisy',

sometimes people react like this 

to hide their insecurity,

it has nothing to do with you.

Your parents will protect you

and later on you can decide to listen to it, or not...

you will learn you can chose

and....chose again 

and chose different...

 if that feels better.

I got a video with your namesong

I think it would be to much for you now ;-)

but in a few years you will love it:-),

what a great reminder.....

to life.....

to enjoy....

to experience,

to be happy.

A reminder for each of us,

we are all on the road from dark to light,

so we can live a life we choose.

Tuesday 20 October 2020

Live your life....

 I saw the movie 'After the wedding'

A movie about living and dying,

about honesty and integrity,

about being a victim and leaving a legacy,

about pain and love,

memory's and hope,

letting go and new beginnings.

A movie, that shows life.....

Do you do what YOU want or

what is best for the other?

Do you live YOUR live and let others live their life

or do you 'think' you know best....

At the end of the movie,

you see 

that she choose to let go 

of her adopted child

to go to her biological child 

to help millions of children......

How do you see the world now?

A world that is being transformed and 'helped'

or a world that is not a safe place anymore......

Do I sound like a broken record ;-)

Perhaps I need a reminder myself......

being patient....

taking it step by step....

In December Saturn will go in Aquarius:

are we responsible enough not to need restrictions from higher up,

are we responsible enough to take care of our selves AND others

or do we need more time....

I am still not sure how much it does,

but I don't mind wearing it if it helps people feel safe.

I realise that a part of 'not liking it' 

has nothing to do with the mask,

it has to do with a feeling

that I am not allowed to say what I 'want' to say.....

and.....that is an old energy.....

'After the wedding'......

Truth, betrayal, honesty.
We don't have to die first 
to make things right....
We can choose everyday to live a good life
if there are hidden memory's,
that we need to address:
life will make sure they come up.

The energy now,
'asks' us to go in within.
We can not go to bars and restaurants,
but we can still go into nature.....
and be....

Nature shows us how beautiful transformation can be....

And as someone mentioned -thank you Loes-
in all this letting go 
you also see
there is new life starting!

A little, baby mushroom is growing next to the big one :-)

Instead of worrying about all the people who don't want to change,
we better focus on our selves


Monday 19 October 2020

Conspiracy theory's...

 Is the Coronavirus fate 

or an inner situation of our society that is not conscious....


Yesterday on Dutch television 

Arjan Lubach talked about conspiracy theory's

and how people come to these idea's.

You see demonstrations 

and the first thing you see

is emotion......fighting against,

-even threads-

 instead of 'fighting for' something.

You hear fear....

and instead of looking at their own fear,

it is easier to fight against.....

'I read it on internet,

saw it on you tube.'

I wrote a blog about 'social dilemma'

the documentary on Netflix 

and he made it visual.

Arjan Lubach talks about algorithm and social media,

about earning money,

about advertisement.

'We as people like sensation, 

that is why we love gossip,

story's that are unbelievable....or not?!?

This what social media is using.....

this is how advertisement is working,

people keep on 'clicking'....

Reading one kind of newspaper is making a tunnel vision.

That is how social media is working....

Facts are not important anymore.....

it's about opinions.....

Algorithms are there to sell advertisement,

not to help you find what is true.....

So Facebook and twitter are checking now

about facts,

Is censoring a real solution?

No....we should think for our selves....

Like the one person on 'social dilemma' said:

'I read also the information that I don't agree with,

so I can make up my own mind.'

Arjan Lubach had a great way of explaining

what is going on on social media platforms.

'When you go to the supermarket, 

everyone sees the same.

What if you go in and you focus on energy drinks and

all of a sudden the whole aisle is changing,

and is full of all kinds of sorts of energy drinks. 

The rest of the supermarket is changing as well:

what there was before,

isn't there anymore:

 you don't see it.

You see rows with crisps because that fits with energy drinks.

If you look good you will find vegetables and fruit,

but that is not so easy.

You see a warning on the bags with crisps bags:

'vegetables and fruit

are very dangerous for your health'.

You gain weight and when you read

the small letters on the energy drink can,

you read that it is because

'there is pedophile courgette in the building'.

The scary thing is,

that if you talk to your neighbour

you don't realise he is in the same shop,

because he sees a total different shop.'

Do we want to go back to normal?!?
What is normal?!?
I don't like to be an algorithm,
I like to be me,
to choose what I desire,
to use my ability to think for myself.....

Because of the algorithm on social media,
we each live in a different world.
And if there is fear
it can be a scary world.
If you don't realise this
there can be a lot of misunderstanding....
even between loved ones and in family's.

The only way to change this,
is if these platforms change it and regulate this....
Will they?
They earn a lot of money this way....
Will government do something? 

I AM responsible.....
How ethical am I?
How is my integrity?
What do I read,
do I check,
or do I follow....
without realising....

The year 2020 is for me the year to become conscious,

a year of letting go what is not good anymore,

and keep what is good.

Most challenging: finding out what is good and what not.....

Keeping internet,

and make rules so advertisement and earning money

is not the key, but information is the key.

Realising we need rules to live as a society

and also realising we are powerful

and can be responsible for ourselves and others.

Also realising that we are vulnerable:

we can be manipulated

and can manipulate...

The more I accepted me,

accepted fear,

the more love I could let in.

The more patience I had with my self

the quicker the process went.

Let's stay healthy

stay safe

Be happy

and enjoy every day,

realising we have a mind of our own....

Friday 16 October 2020

New Moon...

How are you dealing these intensive day's?

Can you feel the feeling and don't become the emotion?

You will Know 

if you look what is coming your way.

Often I write about the challenging mirrors we get

and this can make you forget that you also can have 

very positive ones, 

if you have dealt with your 'old' emotions.

Our son and bonus daughter are expecting their first child

and then there was a corona infections....

not with them, but with a colleague.

Because the delivery is 'now' it was a challenge....

he could not go with her to the hospital

if the time was right...

Because the contamination was nihil,

he took action.

 After a few days

the quarantine was lifted....

-the baby is not born yet ;-)-

The sauna was creative: 

no restaurant, but still 

an opportunity to swim and use the sauna

for a few hours.....


what a great surprise

The male soccer competition could go on in Holland

but the female competition not.....

People took action and....of course that competition can go on as well.

Politician were asked about decisions made


they also admitted that they were not always the right ones...

Show's leadership, mistakes are stepping stones.....

There were demonstrations against the corona rules 

and some of these people were attacking people:

even news crews....

How trustworthy are you if you need to do this....

to bad.....because some of the idea's are good.....

to bad.....there are still 'old' emotions are coming up.....

anger instead of action....

Remember who you are...

Let's act as if we still Know, still remember:

we are loving and powerful human beings,

who want to connect with others.

We ARE love,

we ARE One,

that's why we respect ourselves and others.

We get the change to unlearn what we are not....

I was thinking about the health insurance:

everyone is paying for maternity care....

even man, older woman and people who don't want children...

It shows that we take care of each other

and not only about ourselves,

we are a community...

A new moon, a new beginning,

a new moon in Libra.....relationships, beauty.

Also autumn: harvest time, abundance.