Be YOU and shine in your own unique way! Part 2

 

Playing hide and seek....

His red pepper hiding on his back.....

When I walked around and asked

'please make a little sound',

he didn't answer.

In his own time he came out,

happy that I couldn't find him.

When I asked: 'Why didn't you make a sound

when I asked?'

He said: 'Then you would have known 

were I was!'

I had a day with my grandson Tim.

He and our other grandchildren Zoe and Niek

were around the last month.

Zoe started her school with the Moon eclipse:

can she still be herself and part of the group 

or does she think she has to adjust.

A new start for her......just like for us all:

a new start.

Niek has to adjust, going to 'the gitta'

by himself. 

Is he allowed to miss her

or are people around him trying to avoid this feeling?

Can he adjust at waking up earlier

because it is needed for his sister?

What is it for their parents, how is it for the rest of the family.

All mirrors.

For me, these mirrors help me to let go and trust.

It also touched a 'wound' in myself:

as a teacher and as a therapist 

who is looking at family karma,

I look at it in 'not a mainstream way.....

Is their still an insecurity about this?

I realised I didn't always take myself serious enough

and instead of responding, I reacted....

Looking inside helped AND......

a wound is less deep :-)

-I can not say it is gone.....time will tell ;-)-

The day with Tim mirrored me the energy we are in now.

We wanted to go on the bike,

only....the 'good' bike wasn't there.

The only bike we could use was the one with a

'wobbly' wheel.

'We can go by the bike or with the tram.'

He choose the tram and.....I am not familiar with trams....

He had exactly the place in mind were he wanted to go,

so we went.

-Isn't that exactly what we need to do: know were

we want to go and trust that we will come there

and have the 'tools' inside that we need....-

He had to put his shoes on,

not slippers anymore but boots.

When he had them on he said:

'I have banana feet!'

He was sure....so I said:

'ok, then we chance the shoes'.

When he put the one on,

he felt and.....'o, no, it is ok'.

-Could it be that if we start something new

we feel uncomfortable.....

we believe it is 'not good'

only.....it is good....

we only have to get used to the new phase..-

We had a great day,

went to the children books museum.

It was fully booked only.....we could get in......

'we showed up'.

We went looking for 'poffertjes'

and that was a challenge,

we went into a lot of restaurants 

and finally we found one.

We didn't give up.

We talked and he explained:

'When dad is as big as mom, then he goes to school as well'

Looking as an emoji figurine: 'Why is he crying?' and 

'perhaps the cat hurt him' -there was also a figurine of a cat...-

'That is silly a cat with sunglasses and a hat!'

When he saw some puddles he looked at me.....

'Yes you can walk trough, only not very fast,

because you don't have boots'

And....once was not enough....

'Oma, you have to go to!'

And I followed him.

He talked about his birthday,

his school 'villa Bloom' and Dorian, his friend.

In the tram he talked with people,

wondered why they went out

and told them what he did.

Talked about that you go to work to earn money:

'So you can buy an ice cream when you are on the beach'

We asked people for the right tram,

had to take extra escalators and enjoyed the time together.

Go with the flow,

seeing challenges and trust.

When we finally had our last tram

and had to go out,

he wanted to push the button.

Only.....an adult did this before he could do it and

'I don't want to go out!'

I talked about it and said: 

'we have to, because the tram will go again.

It was not nice of that man to do this,

but he didn't know.'

He went out and looked at the people in the tram.

They smiled to this little boy

who had all kind of story's about his day

and......was shocked he couldn't push 'the button'..

- This is also life. Sometimes it is not going as you want it to go,

not because it is your fault, 

it is just that you are not alone in this world.

The man who pushed the button most likely didn't realise

his action was not nice for someone else.-

On the way back, he found flowers, 

a feather, walked in 'a tunnel',

asked why the coffee cup was not there anymore

-it was on a chair in the morning-

and we found a ribbon in a store for his dragon.

We had to take a toilet brake and played with

toys, went home, made a dragon,

cut and pasted a bedroom and......

were reading books and singing songs.

Could I be me?

Yes, I had a great day.

My mirror: I didn't had a plan,

and I didn't need one: 

I could deal with whatever challenge came on our path.

The dragon we made? 

It was not the dragon he wanted to have:

it didn't have wings.....something for next time.

Make sure you heal yourself,

forgive yourself for not knowing then what you know now,

so you can 'Shine, in your own unique way'.

You are worthy

you are unique,

you are just the way you should be

You are loved.

Whatever happens to you the coming time,

trust and enjoy,

be patient and be open to attract what you wish for.

'Please make a little sound'

Is that not what we like to ask?

Ask, so we get an extra clue to find what is important for us.

AND....

is it not as how Tim answered:

'Then you would have known were I was!'

We have to look inside for ourselves,

we get the clues in the outside world.

Clues from our loved ones, our environment 

and the media.

The 'only' thing we have to do,

is feel........our emotions show us

were we need to look.

Can we deal with emotions.....

Do we recognise our emotions......

Do we choose to feel them....again...

Do we Know, 

that we now are mature enough to deal with them.....

Letting go or changing them.

Do we Know we can choose to find

mature ways to protect ourselves....

Do we allow ourselves to be patient.....

are we determined enough to go for what we want....

Tim is......

Most children are.

Can we guide and protect them 

like we guide and protect our inner child?

Be YOU and choose to shine in your own unique way.

 

How does this work in daily life?

How relaxed and 'at peace' are you

when you are busy, when you are late or

when something unexpected is happening....

Especially parents with young children,

or parents with children in their teenage year

will experience this.

These are the times that 'the cosmos' is testing you:

are there some unhealed emotions in you yet

or......are the -partly- healed....

Also adults without children who travel in a plane

with hungry/hangry children and their parents

with unhealed parts in them ;-)

People who watch the news, and discussion programs.......

without realising how energy works

can project their fears/their wound to the outside world.

Instead of healing and choosing what they want,

the choose to 'stay down'.....

A lot of people were focussing on the eclipse.

On the outside appearances,

lines for shops to get the last glasses to watch it life.

How many looked and the meaning of the eclipse?

Do you?

Donald Trump moved planes because of a threat

and......

he didn't let reporters know 

who stayed in the plane were he was suppose to be....

Infantino wanted to change the World cup of soccer,

without communicating with the board....

It is revealed now....

Can you be YOU and be part of the community.

Were in your live did you sell yourself short,

or.....did you 'outshout' yourself to hide your insecurity?

Were in your life are you reacting from an old pattern,

a pattern that has to do with 'proving'

that you are ok, that you are worthy....

It is time to focus on what YOU choose

and......if you choose from love,

it is always good for the people around you.

Sometimes the challenge is that you don't know/don't realise,

that there are still part in you that choose from deep fear.

Most likely you dealt with it before and 

will recognize an old pattern so you can choose different.

The most important sentence:

'read that right to left'

CONFICENCE kills doubt

PEACE kills jealousy

GROWTH kills ego

DREAMS kills fear

WISDOM kills anger

AMBITION/DREAMS kills laziness

Let this be our mantra the coming year

and be grateful for the mirrors we get.

These are 'just reminder' to help us go on

on the path to live the life we choose to.

Are we ready to 'just Shine'?

 

Pluto and Neptune went already retrograde

and now Saturn is retrograde as well.

We can be confronted with unhealthy habits.

Not to be punished, 

'just' so you can change them.

This energy will stay there

 till the end of this year,

so we get lot's of time

to create healthier habits.

Saturn, the energy of taking responsibility.

KNOWING that 'mistakes' are 'only' stepping stones

so we come were we like to be.

It is our upbringing, rules in society,

being patient, being determined.

It also means that you realise 

that life sometimes feels like 'struggle',

not because you are being punished,

no.....just to help you grow,

to build your 'courage and determined' muscle.

Then there is the change of the Moon Nodes.

They go from Pisces to Aquarius.

The Moon Nodes change every 2 years

and it is a cycle of 18 years.

They are always together: South and North Node.

The South Node is showing us what is easy for us.

We are familiar with this energy.

The North Node shows us what we are suppose to learn.

The last two years we were challenged to trust,

to let go of control.

We were confronted with situations

we couldn't control only.......

did we realise that we have the 'tools'

inside of us to deal with it?

  

I am sure you were dealt with situations/mirrors

were you 'only' could accept and trust....

You had to go on and do what was needed....

I hope that now, when you look back,

you see that you did the best you could

and it worked out ok or perhaps 

it worked out better then you realised.

It is not always easy

and you could also feel

that you were a 'victim' of the situation.

-war, illness, not finding a house a job you wanted-

I hope you took the time to go inside

and could accept, forgive and move on.....

The coming two years the South Node is in Leo.

Can we 'just BE' or.....

do we have to prove we are worthy

because deep down we are still not sure.....

Can we show our own leadership,

or do we have to 'proof' we are right.....

The North Node is in Aquarius:

Do we realise we are all One......that we are all connected.

Do we realise that a peaceful world only

can be peaceful if we respect each other

and see each others gifts?

Yesterday there was a 'hit' on a pride parade in Germany.

It shows that one person with an immature ego -Leo-

can hurt a lot of people.

It also shows that a group of people -Aquarius- 

is so much stronger.

Instead of focusing on fear,

they choose to focus on love and power.

I am sure there is some feeling of fear as well,

only......

they use 'Saturn' to deal with it....

They do what is needed to protect

AND go on showing and celebrating

that we are all unique and all part of society.

How is the relationship with yourself?

I hope you will focus and heal.

I hope you choose love and respect.

I hope you Know you were always worthy

and.....

I hope you heal and forgive yourself and others

for not knowing then what you know now.

The last time the Moon Nodes were in Aquarius:

2007-2009: Banking crises  -Pluto went into Capricorn as well-

1989- 1991: Berlin Wall fell, peaceful revolution.....

What do you remember what happened in your life?

How did you deal with it?

Are you ready to 'just Shine' or

are you afraid....

Do you still compare yourself with others?

Is there a part of you that believe you are not 'worthy' yet?

It is ok......

Remember: 

you ARE love,

you ARE worthy

Just take one step at a time,

build your 'courage and determined' muscle

and SHINE.....

everyday a little bit more.....

Healing.....the only way is to go in and plant a new seed.

 

We still have a frog in our garden,

we don't have a pond anymore.

More than 30 years ago we filled it up with sand.

Years ago I read about it:

'Frogs go back to their birthplace'

Every year, at the same spot

we see the frog.

I can hardly believe it is still the same frog,

perhaps offspring....?!?

How is it with us?

Isn't it the same?

Can we live our own life

or are we a prisoner of our past....

Do we go back to a place

that isn't the best for us,

only we keep holding on to it.....

Do we go back to what we know/knew,

do we pass it on to our children/grandchildren.

Do our children still live a life that is not all their own,

but karma from us and from our past......?

Are we living our own life

or.......only partly......

Partly because we can not let go.....

not always consciously, but subconsciously....

What is the energy you are in?

Do you feel energized or drained.....

What would happen if you could let go of control

and 'just' feel.......

'Just' be open to the idea that you are blocking your energy

by holding on to old energy....not even all from you......

most likely from your family as well.....

What if you could give this energy back to were it belongs

and fill the space were this old energy once was,

with love and peace........

What if we would stop to compare,

be grateful for all the little steps we take every day.

What if we choose to respect other peoples opinions,

AND speak up in a firm respectful way if these opinions

are spoken without respect.

Could it be that we start living from our power,

that we can touch other peoples power

and start a new 'movement'.....

With a lot of retrograde planets and Chiron moving into Taurus

it is a time to go inside,

Know that you ARE love,

born to live in abundance......

YOUR abundance...

Can you relax, take a deep breath or......

are you still to much in the 'doing energy'

What signs do you get from the outside world?

What kind of mirrors?

And: 

do you look in these mirrors and are you choosing 

to change something yourself or....

do you want the outside world to change.......

-The last time I looked in the mirror and I saw

my hair was a mess, it didn't change 

when I told the mirror to show me something else.

No....I had to get a comb myself and after combing my hair

the mirror showed me an image that made me happy....

I.....had to change.-

The spiritual meaning of a frog is: transformation,

cleaning, rebirth.

We are all in a time of transformation.

We all are getting mirrors

and.....

sometimes we go inside and change.

And....

 sometimes our inner child is still so hurt and wounded

that it 'protect' itself to feel safe 

and acting out in an emotional way seems the best way.

If you realise you do this:

be nice towards yourself,

be kind to your inner child.

Do something nice for yourself,

take the time, be patient

and be grateful for every little step forward.

Realise that this wounded inner child

is doing this 'just' to protect you,

to keep you safe.....

it still doesn't know you,

the adult you,

is there to help you...

to keep you safe in a healthier way.

How is it for me?

I get mirrors and I realise that when I do what I love,

I get a lot of energy.

I also realise that I feel my shoulders,

that my energy goes away if I 'don't do anything'....

Those are the times when I am with 'me'.....

So......what do I need......

Can I 'just Be'?

What part in me still believes that

'Just Be me' is not enough.......

What seed do you plant?

Choose to slow down and remember what YOU desire...

The end of the month starts with Mercury retrograde

-June 29 till July 27-

Mercury in Cancer: expressing yourself in an emotional

and empathic way, intuitive and sensitive or

-if not balanced yet-

in a emotional and critical way...

Cancer is the sign of family:

how do you talk to each other,

are you 'afraid' to address topics?

Are you judging and critical and......

how do you talk and communicate towards yourself?

Jupiter, the planet of healing goes into Leo:

it is about YOU.....

If you feel you have to proof something

and be fierce, you most likely are looking at an old wound...

Leo is like the Sun: it 'just' shines......

Most likely you will see energy of 'unhealed' leaders,

perhaps you recognize something in yourself....

I hope they/we/I .....will use the mercury retrograde period

to look inside and heal.

So, instead of reacting in a bossy, unhealed use of power.....

we respond in a calm, honest and determent way.

And then.....July 3th,

Uranus and Mars are connecting......

We already saw this energy in nature:

 a huge earthquake......

Can we use Uranus in a mature way in our own live?

Start new, communicate in a respectful way,

and stand up for what we believe in?

Or do we need something disruptive

to change?

Where in your life do you need to make changes?

Where in your life do you feel you are not doing

what is best for you?

Where in your live are you doing what you believe

'they' expect you to do and did you forget about you?

Did you look at your life cycle plan lately?

How do you feel when you close your eyes

and you are already there?

Pluto in Aquarius....the last fixed sign....

 

Fixed signs and trauma.

Fixed signs like to hold on to what was.....

even if it is not good for them....

Fixed signs are Taurus, Leo and Aquarius.

Taurus likes to hold on to money, safety, material things,

Leo on 'leadership', standing in the spotlights,

Scorpio on deepest emotions, passion

and Aquarius on 'our people', being rebellious.

-I just mention some of the talents/challenges of these signs ;-)-

Now Pluto is in the last fixed sign, Aquarius.

Pluto's energy is of transformation, of total change

AND.....in a fixed sign,

 the resistance of change

is about unhealed trauma.

As I wrote before, Pluto is retrograde

and is 'asking' us to dig deep inside ourselves....

Most likely your conscious mind 'want to',

only.... 

the subconscious 'speaks' louder.

Our inner part doesn't want to feel the pain.....

it doesn't 'know' we are not that child anymore

it only remembers that not going there 

will keep you feel safe from this 'pain'....

You found a way to deal with it...to protect yourself,

to feel part of the group......

and 'forgot' that it is about YOU,

YOU, with your unique talent and gift.....

So we hear people talking about:

'Our land'

'Our people'

'Our group'

'Our family'

We like to belong to a group, 

to belong to 'a tripe'.....

If we have something in common,

 we will be recognized,

loved, accepted and respected.

We don't have to deal with our wound:

we already are part of likeminded people.....

so: 'Why go through this pain of healing?!?'

Could it be because part of you

can not believe that you can

AND be part of the group

AND be unique, talented, special,

authentic?

What is the energy of Pluto in Aquarius 

asking of us?

It helps us to open the door to this wounded child......

It helps us by giving us opportunity's......

It helps us....it doesn't punish us.....

What if we all could decide that even though we believe 

that what we think is the best thing, it could also be different.... 

Perhaps we are blindsided.......

Just this......

Just to be open 

instead of defending your believes.

Just respecting and communicating,

so you hear what others say.......

Perhaps it will give you insight you didn't have before....

Live everyday the fullest,

Find at least 3 things that makes you grateful,

remember 'we are all One':

if you don't like what you see in the mirror of live,

choose to change YOU.

The last time Pluto was in a fixed sign

was from 1984 till 1995.

It was in Scorpio,

a deep emotional sign,

passion, sexuality.

We wanted to hold on to what

we 'thought' what was right,

only ....was it?

Choose to look back and see how far you came,

be grateful for all you did and remember:

You are on an ongoing path.....

a spiral one....

letting go a bit more every time,

Every time a little bit more,

so it is not to scary for that unhealed part in us.

A bit more, so more light and love can come is

and we will remember again how

special and unique we all are....

The poppy: symbol of transformation, hope....

 

Today it would have been my dad's 100 birthday.

These flowers are 'his flower'.......

on his birthday they were always blooming.

Poppy's, 

the symbol of peace, hope,

'there is light at the end of the tunnel'.

It is a very strong flower, it doesn't need a lot

and it blooms only a few days.

It comes back every year and gives comfort.

For me it shows that life goes on,

we learn, we grow, we shine, 

we let go and will shine again.

One of his granddaughters give birth to a son.....new life.

Others go through a period of letting go.....

others of taking a next step.

AND....

we all learn, move on, step by step.

Not all of his offspring,

see and talk to each other anymore.

We had to learn to detach, respect

and.....start to love ourselves first.

I realise that attachment is looking for something outside.

Most of the time because we are 'afraid' of our own power.

Afraid to stand up for ourselves,

afraid not to be loved 

if we do something the other doesn't agree on.

We use 'stuff', 'outside appearances', emotions,

to show the outside world

who we are, that we 'are ok'.....

Mot realising we are not the outside world,

we are who we are....ourselves.....

Pluto in Aquarius want us to be unique 

in a group/family/society.

Using our unique quality to help others 

who don't have this unique quality,

also realising that they have an unique quality we need

 and don't have ourselves....

How come we still need labels,

how come we still can not see people as unique.....

Why are we 'afraid' of people who show their uniqueness/their talent.

Why are we 'afraid' of refugees,

 'Muslims', 'Jews', 'Gays'

Why do we need labels like: ADHD,

'in the spectrum', 'disabled'.........

When I asked my dad: 'Why history, it is from the past!'

He said: 'So we can learn from it and do it different'......

Did we learn, let go and bloom, like the poppy 

or do we repeat the old pattern....

Then 'Against Jews' and now 'Against refuges/Muslims'....

Still looking for a group to be against,

instead of looking inside at our fear,

deal with it and find our peace inside

so we see each other as souls.....

Individuals with unique quality

who like to share and.......

live from love and peace....

Do you label in your family?

Can you see each other as a unique person

or are there emotions,

is their judging involved.....?

Can you be open and honest,

respect and forgive or do you feel 

you have to be 'on your guard'.....

With Pluto retrograde is the time

to go inside and check.......

If you choose to do this,

you will help society......

'We are all One'.

Or.....you can go on blaming 'someone':

a group, government, a country, a leader.......

Let's choose to be a compassionate, loving,

patient leader towards ourselves first.

Discussions, Pluto and Peace....part 2

 

When you read this, it sounds 'easy'

only....Pluto is not always 'easy'......

It is as going into those caves in Mallorca.

You have to go deep inside of yourself,

to deal with what is hidden inside of you.

Hidden because you couldn't deal with it in the past,

most likely because you were a child,

or because you have some energy with you 

from past generations.

We went into three caves

 and all tree were different.

The first one was a huge one,

beautiful, not to deep. 

You could walk around it,

and use steps to go to the different parts.

There was no railing

and although that was ok for me,

it was not ok for Jaap.

Sometimes it is more easy then other times,

to dig deep and deal with your fears/old habits.

If it is easy for you,

you can be 'a railing' for someone else.....

'A railing' so others can go deep and heal

and find beauty.

Where in your life can you be 'a railing'

and ....where in your life can you ask for 'a railing'....

In that cave, there was a family with children.

Most likely they went there 

because the weather was not so nice that day.....

I walked behind them and there was an argument:

'We paid so much, so we are not leaving so soon,

keep on walking!'

Can you accept that you are where you are now

and deal with the consequences of your decisions earlier.

Can you choose to look around and find

beauty....something to be grateful for?

The second cave was totally different.

We had to go deep and there was a railing.

It was also slippery

and......

there were people at corners,

wanting us to go faster......

There was no time to really look at the beauty of the cave.

Isn't that what we do sometimes as well?

We want to go deep, fast, we want to heal, fast....

forgetting to take our time to 'enjoy' the path,

to look and deal what went on in the past....

 
This cave had also water inside 

and we went all the way to the bottom.

There we 'had to' take a seat.

It was beautiful and calm and......

we had to wait till everyone had a seat.....

That took a long time.........

How often did you go deep, dealt with old emotions

and.....were waiting for 'the miracle'.

A miracle that didn't come/didn't come in  what you expected.......

When everyone was sitting down and the lights went out,

beautiful music filled the cave.

Musician on a boat played classical music....

Our  reward of going deep, being patient.....

As someone said to me after:

'the most beautiful and moving experience I ever had'....

Pluto.......go deep, heal, transform.....

The third cave was a cave next to a Dinosaur park.

It had 3 parts, 3 little caves. 

The first one was educational,

they showed  how it was discovered

and also showed the evolution on the cave wall.

Very interesting and someone stumbled,

nothing bad, but still.

Pluto is also stress......it is a 'bursting volcano',

an eruption.....

How much stress is there still in your system.

If we want to change, to transform,

we have to change our thinking,

we have to choose to educate ourselves.

Realising that there are also other ways to live. 

It is not always easy to practise what we know/learn,

wisdom is knowledge plus selflove.....

The last weeks I had a lot of people who were stressed out:

they know what they should do to feel better

only.....

it is challenging to practise it in daily life.

Instead of accepting this, being patient and realising

that something old is still 'in charge' 

- parts that 'believes'

that this is what they need to feel safe and secure-

they blame themselves, judge and punish.......

Pluto will 'help' to let go,

only......trust and accept....

have compassion with your wounded self

that is still deep in the cave.

It will come out if you choose to be loving to that part.

After this,

we came into the middle cave.

It was green, lot's of plants,

there was a place were you could sit down,

have something to drink

and relax.......

Just as you need to do,

when you went deep,

when you had to deal with emotions.

Let the stress go and.......rest....relax....

Can you relax?

Is it ok to do 'nothing'?

Can you 'just enjoy'?

And when we went in the third cave,

it was 'light'......

different minerals, different colours

'light'.....peaceful

And....there was also water, 

there was also music

as if we could experience all of it again,

only in a less 'hectic' way......

Often, 

after we had a breakthrough in emotions',

we get 'tested'.....something similar is happening

only.....

now we can deal with it in a easier way......

Be grateful, be patient, 

have compassion with yourself, trust

and realise that the healing goes on....

If there is still stress somewhere in your life:

KNow there is  still pain somewhere inside of you.

Accept it and deal with it when it comes your way.

and till then....have compassion with yourself.

KNow you have the power and courage to deal with it,

KNow you don't have to do it all by yourself:

be 'a railing' or ask for one.

KNow that if you stumble or fall you can stand up again.

And while going on your path:

decide to enjoy,

to have fun,

be grateful

and be more and more at peace.